


Famous last words: „Sure I'd like to kiss her“

by ItsMeMaxine



Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Asian Character(s), Asperger Syndrome, Autistic Maxine "Max" Caulfield, Black Character(s), F/F, F/M, Feminist Themes, Mental Health Issues, Minor Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Chloe Price, Minor Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Other(s), My First Fanfic, Post-Canon, Vegetarians & Vegans
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:29:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23915350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ItsMeMaxine/pseuds/ItsMeMaxine
Summary: In this alternate universe Rachel & Chloe were saved and everything seems to be perfect for Max and her friends except for some „ordinary“ challenges like vanity, jealousy, racism, homophobia, mental issues, carnism and the like. But the future seems not to have made full peace with her yet.
Relationships: Kate Marsh/Other(s), Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Chloe Price, Maxine "Max" Caulfield/Other(s), Rachel Amber & Chloe Price, Steph Gingrich/Other(s), Warren Graham/Brooke Scott
Comments: 2
Kudos: 17





	1. Dreams are my reality

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: This is my first written story ever. I am not a native american english speaker/writer.  
> I love LiS, the fan art, music, cosplay, etc. pp. Hope i can contribute to the great community! ;-)  
> Please give me your feedback so i can learn and maybe tweak future stories. Tnx!  
> I have finished my first fan fiction story! I live together with 4 persons, a dog, a cat and axolotls :-D  
> A lot of kudos go to escherlat who‘s story MYOC got me here in the first place.  
> BTW: my Avatar here at AO3 is from the great fan art LISVN „Love is strange – visual novel“

"Let there be light!"

And there was light. 

The scene was perfectly illuminated with this soft and reddish tone that was known as the "golden hour".

And she saw that it was good.

She blinked the tears away which obscured her sight to the beach, the beautiful sunset and this girl.

It seemed like eons ago where they both met in this alternative universe which ended so pain...

"Watch out!"

She gets hit by something on the head and blinks heavily against the now bright shining and eye stinging sun.

"You okay?" 

She shades the sun with her hand and throws back the beach ball to the voice coming directly from the sun so it seems.

"You better prepare for what is coming next!", she exclaims and rises quickly to her feet.

A little scream and giggle come as an answer and the shade tries to get away from her which is not easy at this kind of sandy beach. 

She sprints a few yards and gets hold of the attacker in only a few seconds. 

"Gotcha!" 

They both fall into the warm and soft sand and roll over snickering and teasing each other. 

Voices around them cheer and beam:

"There are children watching!"

"You better do this at home!"

"This is what true love must look like!"

"You better not get in my car like this!"

Blushing and breathing they both get up and walk hand in hand towards the whooping crowd.

There they are gathering around them in a circle with the cute couple in the middle like they are the center of the world: 

Warren still the same geek and protective but clumsy friend now wearing a nerdy T-shirt which is showing some belly mainly because of Brooke which shares the same nerdiness to watch obscure movies and enjoys same snacks in the meantime,  
Kate more confident and beautiful than ever with a swimsuit nobody would believe back then she would ever dare to wear,  
Steph with her new friend Kim both throwing glances in their direction to catch glimpses of what might come in their own relationship,  
Rachel with her now almost diva like attitude who always knows that she gets what she wants in the end and two little sand storms named Zan and Sinai running around them like cyclones leaving them in the stillness of the eye of the storm.

They both are so focused on each other in their own shielded sphere that they don't hear anything and don't realize the crowd is distracted by some newcomers entering the scene.

The couple now stands so close to each other that noone can hear what they whisper:

"I have to tell you about a day dream i just had before you hit me on the head!"

"I am sorry, that was not on purpose. Was it a dream about me?"

"Hey, this is serious! You know we talked about this alternative universe where we both met and things were totally different where William was still alive and..."

"Yes of course i know, i will never forget that!"

"I can remember where we both were at the beach and the sun shined in this special light called the golden hour..."

"What?", Max shouted surprised with eyes wide open staring at Chloe.


	2. Friends will be friends

Her sudden change of tone and volume gets some concerned and caring looks from the crowd a little further up the beach. 

"How do you know about that part? I didn't tell you anything about it! Did i talk in the sleep? But this cannot be, you wouldn't know about the golden hour, would you?", Max murmurs more to herself than to Chloe or anyone specific.

"Shhh, shhhh, please take it easy, calm down, breath slowly in and out, let's do it together", Chloe's soothing voice comes back and she hugs Max tightly.

Max tries to get away panicking about the mere thought that this alternative part of Chloe's life comes back so surprisingly and all the bitter memories about the consequences. And Chloe has to experience this all by herself from the view of this perfect reality were they are in now! But Chloe hums her favorite lullaby tune from their childhood and is comforting Max. 

Memories flicker before Max eyes remembering when they first met in kindergarten. Chloe stood up against some bullies who were making fun of (back then) Maxine when she was hiding under the table trying to process all the stress from the many new kids, the loudness and the unfamiliar environment covering her ears and closing her eyes. Her Chloe scared them away and guided Max to a small hiding place where she hummed the same song for her...

With relief Chloe notices that Max is relaxing and breathing more deep and steadily.  
"Oh Captain, my Captain, what should i do without you...", Max sighs. 

They both get distracted by cheers coming from the crowd and the new arrivals.

A tall figure and a smaller one come their way both waving with something in their hands. Max and Chloe are splitting apart and welcome their two new guests to their little beach party. Chloe is hugging Mikey and then teasing him: "What happened to your D&D character in the last session?" , getting the reply: "Hey you better watch out the next time, you ruthless elf!", getting some big grin and a buff from his big brother Drew who is fist bumping with Chloe and giving a twinkle to Max as if to say: "What the heck are they talking about?"  
They all head back to the big crowd where a crackling fire has been started and they are getting some prepared drinks and snacks from Brooke and Warren. 

Max just tries not to think what Chloe just told her and almost stumbles into Kate which gives her a concerned look and takes the presents from Mikey and Drew from Max slightly trembling hands. She guides her to a more private spot at the side behind Warrens truck. "What happened?", whispers Kate holding Max hands when they are out of sight. She knows Max best and immediately senses changes in behavior and emotional state. Max not sure what to tell her best friend just give Kate's hands a quick squeeze and stammers something about a bad daydream Chloe just had before she got hit. Kate realizes that there is more to this but doesn't want to pressure her friend because she knows that this wouldn't help at all. Max promises to talk to her when she sorted things out with Chloe about this incident. They both get back to the fire where music is now playing and some try to sing along. Max couldn't help but smile inside when she watches her friends so vivid and happy from this almost hidden viewpoint. Though the photographer in her wishing she had her camera and tripod with her and could make some cool experimental long time exposure shots against the night sky in contrast to the fire.

She shrieks a little as someone is hugging her from behind and whispering into to her ear: "Arrr, would you join me on a dangerous and mysterious mission to the seven seas, mate?" Max couldn't help but chuckle and whisper back: "Yarr, with you i would go to the end of the world and beyond, my captain." 

They both wander almost unnoticed from the crowd in the direction of the slightly moon reflecting water, tiny waves washing towards them. Chloe had taken her hand and is wandering silently besides Max which is disturbing Max more than anything because normally Chloe has always some cool reply or even swears. But seeing her speechless and absorbed in her thoughts is so uncommon that Max involuntary take over Chloe's part and almost shouts: 

"Chloe, please, talk to me! Why are you so concerned? Is there more to it than this dream?"

Chloe stops dead in her track and looks surprised and caught unprepared. Chloe looks directly into Max eyes and says:

„Oh Max, now - for Christs sake – once I try to protect YOU and i am failing so badly...“ 

Max holds her breath and just gets out: „What do you mean?“ 

Chloe's seems to get out her cigarettes but decides against it and replies: „I spoke to you in my dreams.“ 

Max irritated asks: „To Dream Max?“ 

Chloe shifts uncomfortably from one foot to another: „No, to Future Max.“

„What?“, Max shouted the second time this evening.


	3. Welcome to the real world

„Déjà vu!“, Chloe tries to reply funnily with a forced smile but gets a harsh response from Max saying:  
„This is not funny! You know i swore that i will never use my powers again no matter what!“

But predestined, almost curious, but anxious, she asks quietly back:  
„What did Future Max, i mean, myself – ehm - i said?“

Chloe hesitates a little and is not able to look into Max‘s eyes as she replies:  
„She said that you have to make one last, final choice to save this reality forever…“

They both almost jump as a voice behind them says: „Oh, forever sounds like a very long time to me, not sure if Chloe will get bored on the way…“ 

Chloe bumps Rachel's on the upper arm and responds teasingly: „Hopefully i live long enough to see you ever get married…“ 

„Ouch, that was so mean and rude, you filthy dike!“, Rachel laughs and gives Chloe a playful slap onto her butt. They both joke together and almost forget about Max it seems.

„Hey, you wanted to abduct me from Arcadia Bay to New York or where ever!“

„But you! You couldn't get enough at our first kiss!“ 

Max cheeks burn as hell and she wants to get out of this situation immediately but she is not getting any word out. Though even Chloe seems to realize that Max is pissed, jealous and overloaded at the same time. Out of nowhere her angel Kate seems to materialize right before her and guides her silently back to the fire site. 

Warren waves at her not aware of her status and puts a sandwich in her hand saying: „I made you an extra diary-free one with my total new clandestine recipe...“, but gets only irritated looks by Kate and a mechanical reply by Max: „That's so sweet of you, but...“ she trails off and normally would explain why she wants to live vegan now but doesn‘t has the power to do so and leaves the scene.  
Brook puts him aside and explains to him what signs of a coming shutdown for persons in the autistic spectrum might look like and what Kate had told her also shortly before she left the party. 

Kate leads her to a small tent they had built up mostly for eating and drinking stuff but also with a small sun lounger where Max is gratefully lying down. She gets some blankets from Kate and is trying to relax and close her eyes. Besides her Kate gently sighs: „I know the signs, i already have 3 of them at home...“ Max only replies irritated and weak with her eyes still closed: „What?“  
Kate hushes: „Shh, get some rest. You know Sinai and Zan were diagnosed with AHDS and autism spectrum disorder shortly and my husband is having his tests in a few weeks and i know this kind of reaction already from him… This is absolutely fine… Just relax...“ Max can only nod almost invisibly and dreams off…

As Kate gets back to the fire where the other are sitting in a circle and singing together with Drew playing the guitar she throws some concerned and grim looks in the direction of Rachel and Chloe. „We need to talk!“ she seems to say with her eyes piercing Chloe who could only nod guiltily.

In the meantime Mikey and Steph’s friend Kim discuss some serious topics they seems to have in common: „Oh, i am so sick that my professor at university is still preferring the other students over me“ says Mikey. „I know what you mean, its the same for me when applying for a job or a new apartment. When they see me they try to speak very slowly as if i don‘t understand english or are afraid that i will not be able to pay the rent… Only when they see Steph they mostly relax but only when we hide our true relationship...“ Warren irritated asks „But i don‘t understand. What‘s the problem of these people?“. Kim looks at him – and because Steph had already told her about the nutty professor image of Warren and that he really is not getting it all the time – and she then explains: „White people mostly don‘t see or don‘t want to see racism or racist comments because they are so deeply integrated in history, speech and culture. And it is hard or seems hard to step in for white people because you have this elephant in the room and you don‘t want to accuse or offend anyone. For us BIPoC there is no easy way out, because either way you react ‚fight or flight‘ will only fuel the bias and confirm their stereotype of e.g. ‚quiet and dumb Asian‘ or ‚aggressive and swearing black‘ people.“ As Kim ended the silence following is getting uncomfortable long and everyone seems to be lost in their on thoughts, even Drew has stopped playing guitar. Chloe gets up and mumbles that she wants to look after Max. But it seems that the ice is broken and everyone starts to discusses this topic in small groups and Kate smiles as she sees Drew, Mikey and Rachel talking and Steph, Warren, Brooke and Kim. She hears that Rachel had read the book ‚the hate u give‘ which made a lot of things clearer for her and that Kim and Steph currently listens to a viatnamese community podcast named ‚rice and shine‘ made by two empowering young women which were recommended by her sister who is currently visiting their relatives in Germany.

Kate thoughts wander off… Good that Mathew has already picked up Sinai and Zan earlier. He hated big parties even if there were close friends of Kate and he knew how important they are to her. She could only imagine what Max was going through. She wonders if Max or Chloe know of this medical possibility. She needs to talk to them about this. 

There is a whisper coming from behind which seems to address her. She shrieks a little as Chloe is standing besides her resting her hand on her shoulder and asking: „Where is Max?“ 

Kate leads Chloe directly to the small tent. 

As they enter it they see the empty blanket but no sign of Max.


	4. It’s just a jump to the left...

„But that's impossible!“, mumbles Kate. Her eyes darts guiltily towards Chloe who doesn‘t seem to notice the bad conscience of Kate. Chloe just gets out a: „Fuck!“, through gritted teeth. 

Behind them Warren and Brooke are peeking into the tent as they seems to have noticed the absence of the three women. 

„If this were a Star Wars set i would rather say this is the scene where Yoda and Luke met one final time on Dagobar and Yoda goes to Jedi heaven leaving just the blanket behind…“, Warren tries to be funny not noticing the tension in the tent. He gets a grim look from Chloe and a punch from Brooke besides him. 

After getting everyone together and hearing the stories from Kate and Chloe they all try to think of where Max might have gone and where to search first. After a few seconds Warren exclaims: „Eureka!“, and gets some stern looks from the others but continues: „But there might be a real chance to find her very quick!“ Everyone gets his attention now and different looks ranging from puzzled over amused to bugged.

„You noticed the birthday present Brooke and i made for Max?“, he says.

Rachel replies: „Yes, i think it was this beautiful rainbow colored bracelet?“

„Yes and its not made out of leather nor plastic and….“, he gets on, but is interrupted harshly by Chloe: „Can you pleaaase get to the point!“ 

„Of course, sorry“, he replies quickly and goes on: 

„There is a little gadget inside the bracelet, its so small you wouldn‘t even notice it even if you knew it where there and its one of the newer ones which is lightweight and doesn‘t need any external power source instead it gets its electricity only from the motion energy of the wrist...“

There is an unnerved outcry from Chloe which interrupts him: „Warren!!!!!!“

“Okay, okay, I get it”, he tries to calm Chloe and continues in a less chatty way:

“There is a GPS tracker inside with a GSM module that...”

Now it is Brooke loosing her temper: “What? You wanted to stalk Max?”

Warren get’s red all over his face and wishes that he has the ability of Max to rewind time or any other superpower like being invisble: “It was only for testing purposes and its need to be switched on excplicitly and I wanted to tell Max and Chloe about it right after the party and...”

Chloe’s only reply is: “Can you locate her NOW?”

He is checking his convertible and types in hastily some commands when he first looks irritated then seems to doublecheck after he is finally murmuring more to himself: “This is… fascinating… It looks like the data is a little older and more off site than I thought...”

Brooke seems to be the first who realise the mind blowing impact of his words:   
“What do you mean by a “little” old and off site?”

He pauses, looks up and responds with eyes staring into the infinity of the sky:   
“9 years and 200 miles...”


	5. Life, the universe and everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Due to the book 'support your sisters not your cisters' by FaulenzA i realized that the ‘Loretta’ quote from the movie 'life of brian' offend or humiliate trans* persons (eg. their rights and norms) by defining the normativity what makes a woman eg. her womb or what a woman should be capable of eg. giving birth etc. I first thought of changing the story but decided (indirectly) against it, but rather leave it as an evolution of the story, character, reader and author and to be transparent to the reader and changing or rather reflecting on it in a later (currently upcoming) chapter. If anyone thinks this should be fixed immediately please give me a hint. Thanks to the great community.

Kim bursts out into laughter: “Haha, you guys nearly conviced me, that was a nice show for this party!”, and looks around her begging for approval getting only confused and irritated looks.

Her laughter eventually dies down and Rachel throws a glance in the direction of Steph adding: “You should tell her the full story. Now.”, leaving Kim with mouth open looking help seeking in the direction of Steph. “We need to talk.”, Steph whispers to Kim, dragging her behind out of the circle.

Slowly Chloe seems to gather her confidence and commanding tone back adressing Warren directly: “YOU….”, getting concerned looks from the others when she darts in his direction. 

But eventually stops dead in her tracks when someone shouts: “STOP!”, striking like a thunderbolt. 

Everyone look irritated in the direction of the person where the sudden outburst was coming from. 

Kate continues much softer: “Chloe, I know you must be very”, everyone hold their breath surprised by this tone from Kate and waiting for the first ever swearword from her, “annoyed and scared at the same time. I would be, if I were in lieu of you. We all here are your and Max best friends.”, and after a short pause, “Is there anything Max said before she”, she hesitates for a moment, “vanished?”

This little speech seem to give time to Chloe to calm down and consider that she is surrounded by caring friends who only want to understand and help her. Chloe sighs: “Sorry, you are absolutely right Kate.”, and adding remorsefully, “And yes, there is something important I didn’t tell all of you.”

Everyone is now looking expectantly to Chloe who continues: “I had a dream where some ‘future Max’ was telling me that ‘now Max’ need to make one final decision to safe this future once and for all.”, leaving everyone speechless. 

Mikey is the first breaking the silence: “But where would Max go?” 

Warren flicks the screen back on and answers: “Seattle.” 

Rachel is the quickest, asking in the direction of Chloe: “Isn’t that the place she were at high school? And what would she do there when she is about 15 years old?”

Kate hastily interrupts because she knows what bitter memories Chloe had back then loosing first her father William and then Max - who wasn’t able to hold contact to Chloe during this time period after moving to Seattle - leaving her best friend Chloe behind fendig for herself until Rachel came into her life,

by saying: “Brooke, Warren, how is this time travel even possible? I thought Max could rewind time but then would change the timeline leaving everyone but her with the memory of the former timelines?” 

Brooke takes over this time: “I could bore you all now with a lengthy lecture about quantum physics but I think we neither have the time nor will it help us in this case.”, she pauses for a moment and smiles a little, “So, i will try to explain it – as I learned from a good friend who is working at the DESY facility in Hamburg – with some analogy to movies and series you will all know and love.”, earning her some small chuckles from the crowd. “Of course there is the 80’s all time favourite travel standard ‘Back to the future’”, interrupting herself, “with I am afraid mostly only white dudes and heteronormativity”, getting some big eyes from Warren and Kim each for different reasons, “aside from that we have the classical belief that when we change something in the past that the future will change, confronting you with the ‘grandfather’”, she is interrupted by Steph, “grandmother or better grandparent”, giving Brooke a flash of a video excerpt from ‘Life of Brian’ during the famous ‘Loretta’ scene, responding to Steph with a twinkle: “Thanks Loretta, err I mean Steph”, getting some chuckles from them, “’grandparent paradox’ which mangles your mind when you think of what happens when you kill your own grandparent? You will not be born and could not have traveled back in time in the first place, leaving you in an endless logic loop...”  
She sees some puzzled looks and quickly goes on: “You all know a lot of examples of this kind of linear time concept in movies like ‘Terminator’ and ‘12 Monkeys’ and some enhanced variations in e.g. ‘Frequency’ and ‘Interstellar’. And we have more philosophical and crossover ones which will add some of the new upcoming concept which I will explain shortly e.g. in ‘Run Lola Run’, ‘Donnie Darko’ and ‘Source Code’.”  
She looks around seeing that everyone seems to remember at least one of the movies and gets the basic idea of it, waiting for her to go on:

“We get to the concept of multiverse or alternate realities , where there are endless other universes which exists in parallel to us and maybe totally different but can also have intersections with others or have the same history and splitted up sometime in the past. Famous series examples here are ‘Rick and Morty’ and ‘Stranger things’.”

Finally going on: “So what we know so far from Max time travels she currently is the only person aware of all the changes she made and is the only one going back to the original timeline changing everything and everyones memory there. Maybe she or whatever power she has is able to reunite different time lines and universes again or we have some new time concepts like in ‘Arrival’ but I am afraid this goes more in the meta or philosophical direction than being scientific.”, she ends with a little smile.

This is leaves anyone with their own thoughts until Drew and Rachel almost at the same time say: “Let’s do it!”, getting a big laughter by everyone and a sheepishly grin by Drew and Rachel with some hot cheeks almost unnoticed by everyone.

Rachel taking the lead again says: “Okay, I understood that we are looking for hints and signs from Max to us from Seattle back then. I will make some calls to friends in Seattle in the art collective and will take care of Chloe. I would suggest, that we will all check out our contacts there.”  
Looking in the direction of Drew adding, “Drew, can you check your contacts in the football field?”  
“Yes, of course I can check with the medical NFL team of the Seahawks, but I am afraid I have no clue what I should ask them, hmmm, maybe I try to check for anything uncommon and yes I know the correct person for any rumors.”, he replies with a smirk on his face.  
Steph continues: “Kim, Mikey and myself will check with the local table top & roleplaying community there.”

Warren adds: “Brooke and I will setup a safe space where we all can exchange our findings and where the latest GPS signal is coming from.”  
Chloe finally closes the party and says: “Thanks for all your help and I know that you all love Max and I hope we will find her very soon...”, her voice cracking and Kate comes to her rescue: “You know that we all love you both and that we will do our best that Max will be safe at home soon at your side, but now you need some rest yourself.”

Rachel leads Chloe to her truck and puts her in the co-drivers seat. Talking to Chloe in a low but firm and determinative voice that she will drive the truck and Chloe can relax. Before they drive off she gives Kate a little wink to come over. She whispers to Kate: “Can you please give Vanessa and Ryan a call? I think Chloe will not be able to handle it and ...”, she is interrupted by Chloe, “Hey I can hear you and I am not a little girly anymore, I will call them myself!”, when Kate leans over to Rachel saying, “She is right Rachel, I would also insist to give Mathews Mum and Dad the bad news myself if he were missing.”  
Rachel just nods and gives Kate a quick hug. Rachel drives off with Chloe leaving only the red back-lights behind staring at Kate who stands for a moment alone at the now very dark beach.

Kim comes to her putting a blanket over her shoulders. “You cared enough for your family and friends – and you don’t have any super powers, or I don’t know of them yet - so now its time that someone is caring for you”, she says sheepishly and takes her hand leading her back to the rest of crowd which is finishing the clean-up and loading the remaining stuff onto the truck from Brooke and Warren. They all split up almost wordlessly giving each others hugs, squeezes and daps. Kate is driving with Steph and Kim, Mikey together with Drew and the last ones driving away from the scene are Brooke and Warren leaving only the fizzling extinguished burnt branches behind with some last sparks flying into the pitch black star-spangled night.

Arriving at Rachels apartment Chloe is directly calling Max’s mum. She doesn’t know anything about Max time travel abilities so Chloe is keeping a low profile and thinks up a story that they had a quarrel – which was a little bit true at some point - and Max needed some time and space to be alone. She gave a hint that Max mabye on the way to Seattle and asked Vanessa if she had any idea where or to whom Max would go. Max mum is a little bit shocked at first but didn’t blame Chloe because she knows her daughter good enough that she sometimes needs to be alone for a while to sort things out, relax and gain new powers. Chloe adds that Max left in a rush and forgot her phone. Vanessa says that she didn’t know any actual friends of Max in Seattle and that she might drive to her childhoods home to them. Chloe ends with some guilty conscience and that Vanessa should immediately call them as they would let her know directly when they have a any news about Max.

Totally exhausted Chloe is stumbling on the by Rachel prepared couch. She gives Rachel a small wink to come over and they both talk in hushed voices: “Thanks Rachel for your help...”  
“You don’t need to thank me, without you both power girls I wouldn’t be here at all…”, Rachel sighs, “This is not the right place and time, but I still wonder sometimes what would have happened to our lives when Max didn’t had any super power at all…”, leaving them both in the stillness of the night. 

Vanessa not able to sleep and both nervous and anxious at the same time goes up to Max room just in case she would come and need a place to sleep. While looking superficially over Max old stuff like photos of Max, Chloe and William, some photography books and her old hockey gear she realizes something she could swear wasn’t there before she left the room long ago.

When she steps nearer to Max desks she can now fully see it:

An envelope with “CHLOE” on it.


	6. The Kids are coming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoiler Alert: The chapter contains heavy spoilers for the movies ‘The Sixth Sense’ and ‘Back to the future’

The room was spinning very gently around her head. Or at least it would be if she could see which she couldn't because it was pitch black. There was some kind of déjà vu feeling but she couldn't get a hold on it. The first thing she was able to sense was a delicious smell which reminded her of something. Mhhhmm, she could almost see the tasty waffles before her inner eye, when a thought drifted by saying: “Joyce belgian waffles from the Two Whales Diner where the best...”, and another thought continues, “… but this is not the Two Whales Diner nor Joyce kitchen.”  
She nestled down deeper in her favorite blanket and cuddled her “Captain” teddy bear. She was totally relaxed and felt at peace with the world when suddenly there was a click and some music began to play. She wondered about the song playing, she had a faint feeling that she knew it and there was more to it, but she couldn't grasp it. She was cautiously opening her eyes and some blue light seems to sip through the window (“Wasn’t it called the ‘blue hour’?”, she thought) lighting all the things she already knew and was familiar with: Lisa the plant, books about photography, a picture of Chloe and herself and a big framed black and white photo which reminded her of something, or someone? She stretched and yawned wondering about a rainbow colored bracelet she discovered on her left wrist. Now it all came back in one big flash-back: the party, Chloe’s dream, her jealousy, the meltdown and… a familiar female voice came from downstairs calling: “Max, breakfast is almost ready!” 

Suddenly she felt like the protagonist in ‘The Sixth Sense’ when he finally realizes that he is dead and all the puzzle pieces came together: who could make waffles almost as good as Joyce, why was this female voice so familiar and all the stuff around her? Because she was in Seattle in her old childhood home. But how did she get here? This was an over 200 miles ride from Arcadia bay and she couldn't remember travelling that far. Distracted she searched for some clothes to put on. She wondered why her mother would keep all her old clothes. They wouldn't fit her anymore, but after some searching she gave up and tried some of her back then favourite ones on. She wondered a little that it still fits her but got on to the bathroom where she did a quick catlick and looked into her reflection in the mirror. She almost cried out when she saw herself and could only muffle the sound with holding her hand before her mouth. She almost bit her tongue as she realized that she was – what, 10 years? - younger and now it made all sense to her: the dream from Chloe that she had to change history one final to time get peace of mind. No, no, this couldn't be true, she sweared that she wouldn't travel in time anymore, she was so sick of it, every change and choice made everything much more complicated and unpredictable. She thought about the alternate timeline Chloe now seems to experience first hand or rather had memory of it herself when she was in that wheelchair… Unvoluntarily tears streamed down her face and the thought of messing up another timeline or reality made her almost choke. She tried to practice the exercises she did normally together with Chloe and manages to calm down. She dried her face as good as she could and got downstairs. 

As she walked down she had to think of a an old movie from the 70’s she saw together back then with Warren ‘Invasion of the Body snatchers’ almost expecting that a converted Max would stand at the basement shrieking and pointing at her that she was not assimilated yet. She tried to put that memory away by blinking heavily. Her mother kissed her slightly on the cheek and put some waffles on her plate. Her father greeted her with a side look from his newspaper by saying: “Everything okay? You look tired or hmm rather sad… Sorry, no offense!” Max, realized that maybe her crying might not get unnoticed, mumbles something about missing Chloe while hearing a sad song on the radio at the same time.  
Her mother joint them at the table giving her a quick hug saying: “Yes, I think she is also missing you, but you found such great new friends here and doing great stuff together with them like today!” Max trying to process and remember events, got unvoluntarily help from the flyer on the table before her which stated: “Chase Space gallery exhibition 2009”. She quickly responded: “Yeah I am totally excited going to the exhibition!”, wondering where she had heard that name before. Her father not really conviced looking at her said: “Wasn’t a total hip artist the real reason you wanted to go there in the first place? What was his name?” Her mother gaving her father rolling eyes said: “I think his name is Mark and he is a famous photographer.” Max trying to remember things from back then could only nod. That name seems to ring some bells… Her father interrupted her thoughts: “You should get some waffles before your appointment then. They are delicious by the way.”, twinkling in the direction of her mother. Max absorbed in her thoughts opened her mouth and stopped halfway. Both her father and mother gave her irritated looks. Max trying to sound casually asked: “Mum, did you use milk and eggs for the waffles?” Her mother gave her a puzzled look: “Yes, that makes it vegetarian, correct?”, adding after a quick thought, “If you plan on switching to vegan I need to ask Meredith for some new recipe.” Max stared at her mother not remembering that she was that open minded and even had a friend who seems to live vegan already. Max getting a hold on herself, stammered: “Yes that would be cool, maybe I can take them with me to the excursion for Kristen.” She wondered to herself: ‘Where did that name came from in her memory?’ Her father again interrupted her obviously not noticing her inner monologue: “You two did hang out a lot together lately.” Getting a quick side look from her mother: “Yes, of course since they share the same affection for photography and art.” Max not sure what her father meant with this comment, got on making herself a peanutbutter sandwich. Her father continued: “I am just happy that you have found more than a good friend here.” She tried to concentrate on the conversation but got distracted by a sharp thought that crossed her mind: ‘Max, you better watch out, because you can change time even with this ‘small’ decision to live vegan years earlier….’  
While her parents chatted on what they planned for today she finally finished her small breakfast. 

At the same moment the door bell rang and her father let Kristen into the kitchen. Max was struck by the sight of Kristen – standing there chatting with her father – like she saw her for the first time in her life. She looked taller, more vivid, confident and – her heart almost skipped a beat – cuter? than she remembered. She blushed involuntary and must be standing there for a while staring at Kristen because she winked before her and called: “Earth to Super Max, can you hear me?” She giggled as Max winced a little bit and came closer to her saying gently: “Sorry Max, I didn’t want to startle you.” Max recovered a little bit from the shock and replied: “Sorry, I was lost in a day dream...” Her mother added: “Max also surprised us this morning by saying she wanted to go vegan.” Now it was time for Max to give a grim side look to her mother and she blushed again. Kristen looked guiltily towards Max then to her mother replying subdued: “Maybe it was because we watched ‘Earthlings’ together and I should have known that Max is such a tender-hearted and sensitive person...”, she stopped and looked help seeking to Max. There were many conflicting emotions, memories and thoughts inside Max making it for her very difficult to get out any answer. Her mother knowing her best quickly stepped in and comforted Kristen by saying: “Oh Kristen, don’t worry about that, its absolutely fine with us and we will sort out the details with Max later calmly.” Kristen sighed and the words seemed to took a load from her mind. Her father said: “You better catch the next bus and enjoy the show.” Vanessa just rolled her eyes and gave Max her packed satchel. 

In the bus Max tried to bring it all together: why did she had such a bad memory of things in the past especially her teen years? What was her relationship with Kristen back then? Did she had the abilities already? Why did she traveled back to this specific day? What had to change? And who brought her back here in the first place when she couldn't remember doing it herself?  
She realized that Kristen watched her sitting sidelong in the bus, still looking concerned. Max frightened thought that she even had the feeling Kristen knew what she was thinking, but this was impossible, she was imagining things. She had had to pull herself together. Kristen gently began to speak: “I know that you sometimes zone out or want to be alone, but you look so confused and vulnerable today. Max is it okay, when I give you a hug?” Max looked at her the second time with mouth open. ‘How and why did she know so much of her inner feelings and needs?’, she tought and awkwardly replied: “Err, yes, this would be okay.” Normally she hated it when people hugged her, but from people she loved or with consent and with a firm touch - like Chloe was doing it with her before to calm down – it was okay for her. She was again surprised as Kristen hugged her short but firmly as if she knew her very well. 

They had to leave the bus at the next stop and walked towards the Chase gallery entrance. Immediately they felt a little bit out of their element as mostly older, stylishly dressed and bigheaded people were in there sipping at their drinks. Max didn’t want to ask Kristen why they were here in the first place or what was so special about this photographer she didn’t recognized anymore. She didn’t had to time find out because some importantly looking girl their age came directly towards them. “I am sorry this is not the place you are looking for, the cinema is on the other side”, she said sternly as if she owned this place eyeing them both up making clear they failed to meet her requirements. Kristen straightened up so that she now was taller than the girl and loomed before her. Max defense mode kicked in and she didn’t want to cause any trouble maybe changing reality. She said: “Oh, sorry, where are our manners, we didn’t introduced ourselves: This is Kristen Fernandez and I am Max Caulfield. We are mostly here to see Mark and his pictures. And you are?” The girl seem to be surprised but was regaining her confidence very quickly: “Of course everybody is here for Mark and I am his personal assistent by the way. I will manage his VIP party later on.” Now Kristen seem to recognize her counterpart: “Aren’t you the daughter of the Chase gallery owners?” The teen seem to be happy that she were recognized only by her appearance and answered…

...”Victoria Chase here.” In the meantime - 9 years later - Rachel was phoning her art contact in Seattle as she had promised. First Victoria seemed to be surprised to hear from Rachel then switching to suspicious. Rachel way over her battle with Victoria to be Queen-bee back then in Blackwell was teasing her: “Hey, you still remember Max?”, getting a reply she wasn’t expecting. “Is she alright?”, Victoria asked almost anxiously. Rachel always thought that Victoria disliked Max, but maybe there was more to it? She quickly replied: “No, she is fine, but we are searching for old stuff, photos and stories about Max, preparing a surprise for her 25th birthday.”, she lied without even blinking. “So do you remember anything from your time in Seattle?”, she continued. There was a long pause at the other end, as if the connection were bad or anything like that, but then came Victoria’s voice crystal clear: “If I would be superstitious – which I am not – I would call this fate not an accident, but I dreamt last night about an encounter I had with Max and her girl friend back then...” Rachel made a mental side note about a ‘girl friend’ from Max back in Seattle, not sure if Chloe knew about it, but maybe she doesn’t need to be that nosey anyway, “…i even could not remember meeting Max before Blackwell, but I remembered this girl who was with her when we met in the Chase Gallery of my parents. She reminded me of Chloe even if I didn’t know her back then. Now Rachel clearly was interested in this girl and chatted with Victoria also about some new projects she got and other gossip talk. 

Max couldn't believe that they just met Victoria Chase who was so much like later in Blackwell but on the other hand already had her own style as she showed them some photos of her great portfolio Max had to admit. Kristen seemed to know some people and they headed towards them. Max used the situation to excuse herself and get some moment of calm at a nearby fountain. She looked at the small group Kristen was greeting. They looked really nerdy and seemed to go to some kind of cosplay or convention because they were dressed like the characters in a story of J.R.R. Tolkien. She wondered how they got in here like this and noticed that they may had some connections and were part of a small show for another part of the exhibition. She had to think about Steph and Mikey and their knack for role playing games. They would totally love this. She had to ask Chloe if they maybe get together to one of their games or even a convention. Her mind wandered and she thought about what she had to ‘correct’ in this reality to get peace of mind. First she had to get some message out to Chloe and her friends who possibly wondered where the heck she was. She knew Warren and Brooke, they surely would search for signs of her. Wasn’t there time travel movies where the protagonist wrote some message to the future? She remembered ‘Déjà Vu’ and ‘Frequency’, but what was she going to place and where? An idea built in her and smiling she stood up and walked to the nearby group. 

Steph, Mikey and Kim were phoning their role playing contacts in Seattle and asked if they had any online archive or anything from 2009 they could search for a retro talk they planned to do at the next convention. The girl they talked to said that they lately digitized all the old magazines and that they might find some interesting articles or even ads there. She gave them an online account with access to that archive and wished them luck in digging out old stuff. They eagerly logged in but first didn’t know what to search for when Kim suddenly said: “What exactly is Chloe’s characters name?” “Callamastia.”, Mikey and Steph exclaimed at the same time. “Why do you ask?”, Steph asked. “Because there is a message from ‘Mad Max’ to ‘Callamastia’ in the private board section.  
Steph and Mikey both jumped and looked together onto Kim’s screen: ‘Mad Max to Callamastia: Love from your partner in time. I will always find you no matter what it takes. Greetings to our backup crew here from the hideout!’. The three of them cheered and high-fived when they immediately posted the news over the prepared channel from Brooke and Warren. There they read that Chloe was on her way to Seattle because Vanessa called her that she found something quizzical in Max’s room. They also saw the news about Max encounter with Victoria Chase. 

After the role playing party assured Max that they would post the message for her. Kristen and Max strolled on to further discover the hidden treasures of the gallery when she suddenly saw a somewhat familiar logo on a T-shirt just before her. There was another logo besides it which seemed to be a lion with a crown? The T-shirt belonged to a maybe 3rd grade young girl which seemed to be tagged along here by her parents and was obviously bored. Max involuntary thought about the time when she and Chloe were the girls age… Back then they played pirates and prepared everything for their time capsule project… She was so lost in her daydream that she accidentally touched a nearby vase so unluckily that it felt from its base and… 

…suddenly time almost stood still. Max opened her eyes and there she was with her hand held out in its iconic gesture to rewind time and it reminded her about the incident when she rescued Kate from the roof of the dormitories… Time was only slowing down, but how could that be? Did she had these powers all along and didnt’t know about it all these years? But there was no time to waste. She had to put the vase back in the right place and go to ‘normal mode’ immediately so nobody would be suspicious… 

…when she saw the girl with the T-shirt… She was in short reach of the vase and had almost captured it safely. She had to admire her super human reflexes and will. She had no other option as to release time again and let the girl hopefully catch the vase safely for her. Max switched to ‘normal’ time and saw the girl before her catching the vase and landing with it on the ground, like ... now she knew where she had seen that logo before! She almost wanted to applaud the girl for her commitment, but she managed to get out a “Wooooooowwwwwser!” instead. The parents of the girl quickly hushed towards them and Kristen at the same time asked: “Everything alright?” As they were in a more remote part of the gallery nobody else seemed to have noticed the event. The parents were immediately apologizing as they apparently didn’t saw the incident with their own eyes. Max responded calmly that instead she had clumsily thrown the vase to the ground herself and that their daughter had rescued it and instead she was deeply indebted to her. They agreed that Max and Sarah could have a few minutes with each other. Max sat down besides Sarah on a nearby cubus for visitors and exhaled audibly. The girl looked at her expectantly and curiously asked: “Your name is Max?” Max smiled and thought about the time when she was called ‘Maxine’ and the events that let to the change of name to ‘Max’ instead. She replied: “Yes, my birthname was ‘Maxine’, but one day I decided that I wanted to be called ‘Max’. I think it was around the time when I was your age.” The girl seemed to think about Max’s statement for a while. Max carefully asked the girl: “I see that you are wearing a football shirt of the Seattle Seahawks, but I don’t recognize the other teams logo.” Sarah seemed to be in her comfort zone now and replied: “This is from the Majestics football team.”, and continued as Max looked unknowable, “It’s the women’s football team of Seattle.”  
Max mentally facepalmed to herself, she couldn't get rid of this normativity especially in sports, the big players with money, public appearance and acceptance were always male teams be it basketball, baseball or football, except those that were approved as female maybe showjumping or gymnastics, but without the money. She noticed that the girl seem to hesitate or struggled with the right words to go on with her explanation: “I also want to play football one day but...”, she trailed off. Max looked at the girl and said: “Sarah, when I was your age I wanted to become a photographer one day and...”, she had to stop herself from going on, “… after school I will study arts and photography. Noone can stop me there. And you, you made this epic catch and saved my butt.”, she saw that Sarah unintentionally grinned, “I see clearly that you will go your way and be a fantastic…”

“...football player!” Drew asked: “She met what? A female angel? Chang can you please be a little less cryptic and tell me the story from the beginning without any exaggeration?” His friend Chang from the Seattle football medic team chuckled on the other end of the line. “Okay, okay, but this is such a great story. You know the classic hero’s journey and the step ‘supernatural aid’? This fits so perfectly!”, Chang started again but Drew intervened, “Pleeeeeeaase! Gimme a break!”  
“Okay, you know Sarah?”, Chang asked. Drew thought a little and replied: “You mean Sarah Thomas the first woman to officiate a bowl game?” Chang answered surprised: “Wowhh, okay I didn’t know that, 10 points for feminism, but nevertheless I am not talking about white dudes or even dudettes here anyway. No, I mean the new talent from the Seattle Majestics. She was interviewed and replied to the question what brought her to football was an event in 2009”, Drew listened attentively now, “when she met a teenage girl who encouraged her to play football against all odds. But know comes the fantastic part.”, Drew could hear Chang changing his voice to pastoral, “She remembered the encounter so vividly, because the teenage girl accidentally bumped over a vase and Sarah was able to catch it”, Chang seemed to be at the climax now, “and during that catch she saw that this teenage girl seemed to have stopped time and sped up things after she saw that Sarah would safely catch the vase...” Now it was Drew who tried to hide his excitement, when he asked: “What was the name of the teenage girl?” Chang replied: “Her name was...”

… Max said good-bye to the little family and Kristen looked at her in a way that she couldn't comprehend. Was ist jealousy? No. Astonishment? Maybe. But Kristen just said with a warm smile: “I didn’t know that you were that good with children and I thought I saw a little bit of a feminist in you.” With a side look Max registered that Kristen really meant this as a compliment. She had to think about a conversation with Chloe about having children, but they weren’t really going into details at that time. They all had this stereotype in their heads that Kate will be having children and would be a good mother. And yes she saw that motherhood was laborious and even more with children like Zan and Sinai having AHDS and Aspergers not mentioning who will be at home or could they both have part time jobs and so on… She sighed and looked up to Kristen and again didnt’t know what to make of this look she gave her. From the corner of her eyes she saw two shadows coming towards them hidden by a sculpture so that the second time this day a collision seemed to be unavoidable. She tried to slow time down again, but either she wasn’t quick enough or her powers weren’t fully developed yet, it was not working. Max gave one last look to one of the figures which seemed to be somewhat strangely familiar. And now it hit her with all the power of the events of this morning: The black and white photos, the famous photographer, the name Mark combined with the events of her life she would never forget: The dark room, Rachel’s body, Chloe shot by... 

…Marc Jefferson 

The last thing she remembered was the concerned face of Kristen bent over her saying her name: “Max, Max….”, then it all went black. 

She recovered with her head resting in the lap of Kristen which almost cried out: “Oh Max, good, you are back… “ She noticed blood on a handkerchief in Kristen’s hands… Kristen said: “After you accidentally bumped into Mark and Mrs Chase getting her drink spilled all over her ‘expensive’”, she almost spitted the word out and continued, ”clothes they both ran away, she because she needed to change and he… “, she hesitated as if the picture of Marc Jefferson has changed extremely in the last few minutes, “… he needs her support for his photographs and the exhibition...”  
Max head spinned and she felt the well-known nosebleeds decreasing. Kristen gave her the tissue and helped her getting up. She looked shocked, sad and undecisive at the same time looking in the direction of Max: “I am sorry that his day didn’t work out the way we planned...” Max took her hand and just said: “Thanks for caring for me and being there when I needed you. Please get me back home.” Kristen squeezed Max’s hand and supported her to leave the gallery. 

In the bus Max couldn't stop thinking about what to do next and what needs to change. Kristen thoughtfully looked over to Max and almost whispered: “I think you are right, we need more women power … maybe also in the art sector...” Max was glad she had inspired Kristen, but also didn’t thought of herself as being a feminist, neither engaged in political activity nor had read much about it. The bus ride was only short and Kristen helped Max back to her parents home. Max mother looked a little bit shocked when she saw the blood. Kristen hugged Max tightly and wished her a good recovery. Max said to her mother that she needed some rest to think about some things and that her nosebleeds already stopped so she was only lightly hurt. Kristen waved goodbye and Max got upstairs back to her old room.

As she was lying down on the bed she thought about this hecka crazy day… She didn’t know if she changed anything of importance so that the future might now be even better as before. When she learned anything today then that she needed to get in contact with Kristen in the future. It was the same same lack of contact as with Chloe when she was in Seattle. After she moved to Arcadia Bay again she also lost the connection to Kristen here. Why was she so bad with people? Why she couldn't always understand or express her feelings? What if she would have understood the feelings of Kristen and was earlier aware of her own feelings towards girls? What would have happened? Would she be together with Chloe then? She needed to find a way to minimize the impact to the future but also to get the message to her future self if she lost all her memories from today. An idea grew in her: She would compose a letter to herself but would double blind it so that her former self wouldn't see the message to future Max. She had to think about ‘Back to the future’ where Marty wrote a letter to Doc Brown about future events to save him and he teared the letter before his eyes and said that its dangerous to change the future, but taped the letter later back together to take precautions for his coming death. She sealed the letter and put it on her desk. It was weird to write to herself, it was rather different than writing the diary like journal or take pictures. She was so tired, so she hoped that the universe would take care of itself this time. When she lied down on the bed she didn’t know what to expect but she almost closed her eyes thinking about Chloe as she felt her phone under her. She grabed it and looked at the missed message from this noon:

‘hey hippie’


	7. It‘s the end my friend, my only friend

She was floating. 

She just was. 

There was no time, no space, just…. It didn’t matter…

There was something important… She had to, she had to… 

The thought slipped away into nothingness. 

She heard somebody singing…

Suddenly she saw a myriad of threads, all glimmering and shining, intertwined and constantly moving as they were living or part of a living being. She tried to get nearer and get a closer glimpse as the threads seem to bent away everytime she was getting nearer a cluster of the strings.

They looked so beautiful, so innocent, but nevertheless immanent powerful. 

The humming in the background filled the void, her inner void. It was getting stronger and more and more distinctive. 

Was she watching the creation of the universe? What, who, whatever was making this familiar and soothing sound? Was she dead? 

She liked it being everywhere and nowhere. She had no body nor shape. She felt she could be anywhere, anytime, anything.

She enjoyed being in the flow, the perfect flow. This holistic vantage point was what she had dreamt of.

A thread floated by showing her or rather projected, communicated? its inner substance directly to her. She wasn’t sure what it was about, it reminded her of a, her? former life? It was something about a movie? called ‘The Matrix Reloaded’ which she had watched together with Warren, who or whatever that was.

The strings suddenly seemed to abandon their seemingly random floating behavior and were now mingling and dancing like there were being orchestrated by some almighty force or will. Some strings seemed to be getting darker and smaller, some instead getting brighter and thicker like…

...like a ‘neural net’? Where did these words were coming from?

She could feel an omnipresence coming nearer. Was this the source of the humming?

It seemed to be the source of the reconstruction behaviour. 

She tried to play with or even change the strings herself, but they didn’t seem to budge or even reveal anything to her.

That was okay as long as the humming kept on going along with this perfect space and time opera.  
The scene was now changing before her eyes as some god like power was zooming into the threads to a special one and she was carried away right into the inside of this particular string. She was amazed as a scene unfolded before her which was somewhat familiar. A beach with a beautiful sunset and two girls, one in a wheelchair. There was a slight aching which she couldn't explain or really feel, but the humming soothed her and she was again dragged away leaving the scene. 

Back again from this birds eye view the mingling of the threads seemed to start again but this time it was like the conductor was present now and was rearranging with its invisible baton the whole cluster. The humming faded away as if the source was now happy with the results and leaving the scene.

All of a sudden her view changed and she was now floating in a restaurant and was watching the opera scene from there.

* * *

Besides her(?) was a human being(?), a woman(?) who was communicating, talking(?) to another being, an animal(?) 

Due to a fish(?) in her ear(?) she(?) was able to hear(?) what the animal, cow(?) was telling the woman(?):

“...I would like to offer my fat and tasty shoulder to you braised in a delicious white wine sauce. I've been exercising it and have been eating plenty of grain, so there's a lot of good meat there...”

She(?) could feel some sort of indescribable anger(?), fear(?), helplessness(?) rising… this wasn’t right(?)… she had to stop it… now… Now… NOW!

As if the woman(?) could hear(?) her(?) she(?) looked in her(?) direction and smiled(?).

* * *

A transparent pop-up occurred before the woman saying ‘What to you to want to do?’ and offered her three choices: 

1\. ‘Accept the offer and order two rare steaks.”   
2\. ‘Decline the offer and ask for a salad.”  
3\. ‘Ask if the cow would kill itself humane.”

* * *

Max was almost exhaling - if this was possible - as Chloe chose option 2.

Chloe was strolling over to a bar where Steph, Kim and Mikey were sitting and playing a D&D game.

Max was a little distracted as outside the restaurant the universe seemed to be melting, boiling, bubbling and the threads would be exploding any minute.

She looked back to the role playing party as Chloe exclaimed: “Sure I’d like to kiss her!” 

The last thing she remembered was Steph saying: “Famous last words…”

* * *

* * *

The room was spinning very gently around her head. Or at least it would be if she could see which she couldn't because it was pitch black. There was some kind of déjà vu feeling but she couldn't get a hold on it. The first thing she was able to sense was a delicious smell which reminded her of something. Mhhhmm, she could almost see the tasty waffles before her inner eye, when a thought drifted by saying: “Mums vegan waffles where the best...”, and another thought continued, “… but this is not my childhood room nor Seattle.”  
She nestled down deeper in her favorite blanket and cuddled her ‘Captain’ teddy bear. She was totally relaxed and felt at peace with the world when suddenly some music began to play. She wondered about the song playing, she had a faint feeling that she knew it and there was definite more to it and wasn’t it... She was cautiously opening her eyes and some light seems to sip through the window lighting all the things she already knew and was familiar with: Lisa the plant, books about photography, a picture of Chloe and herself and a framed photo with two girls she didn’t realize. She stretched and yawned wondering about a rainbow colored bracelet she discovered on her right wrist. 

How old was she? 

Where was she?

Was this groundhog day? 

Where the hell did she knew this song from?

A familiar female voice came from behind her giggling: 

“Hey Sleepyhead… I rick rolled you!”

She almost jumped around in a mixture of anger, disbelief and bliss to hug Chloe, falling down with her onto the bed kissing her all over. 

“Hey, tnx for the morning grope!”

Now Max saw what Chloe had prepared: A breakfast with waffles, jam, tea (Chloe and tea??) and candles…

She almost wanted to thank Chloe and gave her a big hug as the music changed to a... punk rock song? What they were shouting? ‘Bartender, pour me a glass’???

She hadn’t seen Chloe blush often in her life, but this was one of the rare occasions (Max also knew that Chloe had a much more soft core than anybody would think.)

Chloe made some hasty swipes on her mobile and the music changed to a ballad? of the same band? 

“Kim’s friends in germany recommended to me this now unknown band named H-Blockx”, Chloe tried to explain.

“So, who is meant by this ‘little girl’ they are singing about?”, Max teasingly replied.

Max tried not to chuckle as Chloe’s face colour was deepening even more.

“So now enough of this dudes, here comes the power of women!”, Max ordered and chose another song from her playlist. 

She took Chloe in her arms and slowly danced with her to the song ‘All that matters’ from Riley Hawke. 

“The lyrics totally reminded me of us...”, Max whispered in Chloe’s ear.

Now it was Chloe’s turn to look astonished as the next song started from Max playlist.

“What the heck...”, Chloe managed to say.

Max had to keep her countenance as Chloe tried to listen to the song ‘Ebow 400’ which was sung by Ebow in english and german. There was no doubt that this song was definitely marked as explicit in every streaming service out there. Max had never seen Chloe like this before and this was such a great revenge for her being rick rolled that she almost jumped and sang along the part of the refrain: “Cuz you know, I feel love!”

After the song they both fell again onto the bed and Chloe gave her some hungry looks so that Max was giggling: “Woowser, I didn’t know that I was for breakfast...” 

As Chloe playfully tickled her, the photo with the unknown women came again into Max's field of vision and she could read the names below it, Kelly and Lynn. 

Now she knew where she had seen the names before! They were labeled on folders in the dark room… Chloe instantly recognized that there was something wrong and held Max tight and looked her in the eyes hushing: “Max, you are safe, we are all safe, you did it, my Super Max...”, she was breaking into tears and was hugging Max so tightly that she thought her ribs were cracking.

Now Max was totally irritated as she normally was the only one with memories from her time travels. Chloe seemed to recognize Max’s confusion and began telling her the full story from their viewpoint while she couldn't explain to her this anomaly about the mixture of memories. From her encounter with young Victoria and the message in the D&D board which were found by Kim, Steph and Mikey to her involuntary changes when she met the back then little, now big football star Sarah. “Yes, and you are right, I can also see it clearly before me when we where back then in the dark room and found all the folders with the names of Kate, Rachel… “, she shuddered involuntary, “.. and also for us back then unknown girls Kelly and Lynn. But now they are alive and we are friends...”, her voice trailed off.

Max couldn't believe it. How was this possible? What did she do that history was changed? How could Chloe remember all this former memories from the alternate reality? She was faintly remembering her dream about the reorganization of the myriad of strings and about Chloe. This was just a dream, right? This couldn't be true, she was imagining things, this was just the same as the bad nightmare trip she had at the end of this life changing week which now seemed ages ago.

Chloe which hadn’t noticed Max inner monologue had already continued: “…we are not sure, but it seemed that psychopath Jefferson had a liaison with Victoria's mom and she found out about his pervy nature when she caught him in flagrante with her drugged daughter. This time much much earlier even before he got to Blackwell. Seemed she blackmailed him with this knowledge and threatened him ti go to court and end his career, instead he had to bring her new talented students for her gallery while she boosted his career and promoted him to Blackwell where he was under her control. So he never touched any other girl to our knowledge...”

Max thought about it for a moment and had to cry and laugh at the same time. This wasn’t possible! She bumped by chance into Jefferson and Victoria's mom causing them to get to know each other leading to this almost perfect reality? This was too good, there had to be a hidden twist, or anything like that.

But then it hit her. Why wasn’t she thinking about the things she was causing when she interacted with her own best friends… or better not interacting at all… why was she making the same mistakes the second time? Not recognizing and endeavouring her own wishes and emotions. A wave of self depression and self hate washed over her wiping away the big euphoric win she had just achieved in a blink of an eye.

Chloe looked at her anxiously and expectantly. 

Max had to force herself to look directly into Chloe’s eyes.

“Chloe, I have to confess something to you.”


	8. Friends will be friends

“You were not my first crush”, Max managed to whisper.

Chloe looked at her with an equilibrium and wisdom which Max had seen rarely. 

She waited for an outburst of anger, laughter, surprise, anything, but Chloe just sat opposite of Max and took slowly her hands into hers.

“I already know”, Chloe replied with a smile.

“What?”, Max felt lost for a moment.

Then Chloe couldn't hold herself back any longer and started to burst out into laughter.

“Sorry, I couldn't resist, but I thought my partner in time would remember writing a letter to...”

Max facepalmed and moaned while bumping Chloe into her ribs: “I bare my heart before you in this intimate moment and you! I knew that you wouldn't change an inch in 9 years, you...”

She almost jumped onto Chloe so that they both fell back onto the bed. She was looming over Chloe with a devilish smile on her face: “Breakfast has been served.”

* * *

* * *

After the delicious breakfast Max was getting serious again and was looking at Chloe: “You know that I made the same mistakes with Kristen later on as with you back then, when your...”, she couldn't go on and her voice broke as she thought about the day when Chloe’s dad William never came back from his tour picking up Joyce. Chloe looked at Max with a faint smile: “You had a lot of problems of your own and I don’t know if I would have that deep friendship with Rachel then...”, she continued, “You cannot revert your behaviour from back then but you can build up a new friendship now upon the foundation from the past. I think you should make a phone call.” With a childish smile she added: “And I have prepared something for you in collaboration with your mom.” Max looked in astonishment to Chloe: “What have you done?”  
Chloe laughed outright and calmed Max: “No worries my Super Max. I have just prepared a video call with Kristen in about 15 minutes. She knows you will be calling. Her mum and Vanessa seemed to have made contact again accidentally through some business project lately.”  
Max realised that she was getting hot flashes and tried to conceal it before Chloe.  
“I know that life could have been totally different for me and for you if we had made other choices”, Chloe knowingly continued, “but be aware that I will definitely keep track of her and...”, she teased Max and grinned at her as she saw the scared expression on Max face, “… will definitely let you enjoy your first steps without any interference from my side.”

Max sighed and felt nevertheless a bit shaky when she called Kristen with her phone. For her it was only hours ago when she last met Kristen, but in reality this was 9 years ago… How would she look like? How would she react? Would she be angry or disappointed? She tried to breath steadily and concentrated on the screen.

Suddenly an unknown person (a woman?) appeared on the display. Max felt a little bit uncomfortable accidentally contacting an unfamiliar person. After regaining her confidence she said: “Hi, I am Max and I would like to speak to Kristen.” She could slap herself for talking like she was having a job interview. The person on the other side didn’t seem to notice her formal tone and just replied: “Hang on a sec.” Max could hear some muffled voice fragments: “Kris, there … Max…didn’t… Doe-like beauty… talk…” and then suddenly Kristen was in the line grinning leaving Max speechless. She seemed to have cut her hair and had some green streaks in it. Max could only manage to get out a “Wowser.” Kristen’s grinning grew wider and she said: “Hi Max, it’s also good to see you again. Sorry, this was Sam and they had my tablet where I was still logged on.” Max unconsciously recognized that Kristen referred to Sam as ‘they’ which she had heard mostly from persons from the queer community for different reasons like that they wanted to free themselves from the binary gender normativity.  
“Yes, umh, no problem, same for me, it’s good to see and hear you again. Look, I was a total jerk for not….”, Max clumsily started but was friendly but determinedly interrupted by Kristen, “The past is the past and it always takes two to tango.” Max could only nod in consent.  
Kristen continued: “To revive our last a little bit odd gallery tour I would like to invite you again to a hopefully total different exhibition. And this time I would have more influence than the last time, because I am the owner of the gallery now.” She grinned even broader if this was possible and Max could only reply: “Are you cereal? This is so cool! Yes, I totally would like to visit your exhibition.”  
“Some things nevertheless never change and at least one thing will be the same as last time”, she chuckled, “It’s Victoria, she will also show some of her stuff exclusively there and I am not sure if she recognized me from back then from our encounter there at the Chase Space gallery.”  
Max told her about the conversation Rachel and Victoria had the day before where Victoria at least could remember Kristen from the exhibition from her dream.  
They chatted some more about stuff they were currently doing and Max unbroken knack for analogs.  
Finally Kristen said: “Sorry for being so direct, but is it okay for you if we could talk in private before the exhibition about some unspoken things between us as I know from our moms encounter that you live together with your girlfriend Chloe.”  
Max blushed and felt like the day before when she was 15 and the look Kristen had given her.  
She stammered: “Yes, of course, that’s total fine”, then after a pause and exhaling, “Thanks for being so honest and I am totally glad that we could have a fresh new start.” 

After the call Max felt exhausted, churned and at peace at the same time. Chloe hugged her from behind and kissed her lightly: “See, sometimes its good to shrug off your past and confront yourself with your own fears. Which in the end are not that big and unsurmountable as they seem. I am so proud of you.”

Chloe continued: “By the way, I have another surprise. Your backup crew is waiting for you!”

Max surprised by the unexpected announcement and sounds coming from the front door turned around and saw Steph, Kim and Mikey all running towards her. But to her astonishment they were all dressed in medieval costumes with armor, weapons, jewelry and make-up including even scars. She laughed as the three improvised a little fight because they could not agree on what to do with Max and Chloe. Mikey the Wizard was waving his wand like a lunatic and was trying to cast a spell by murmuring in some obscure language while Steph and Kim as warriors were sword fighting and tried to insult each other. Finally the three were joining Max and Chloe on the bed. She was so happy to see them. Kim said they planned to do a tabletop role playing games (TTRPG) session together with them, of course only if they wanted to join. They were totally inspired by the queer ‘life of the party dnd’ group which were making awesome video sessions of their gameplay. Chloe looked cautiously over to Max and nodded in silent response as she knew that Max would be a little afraid to check out this unknown territory and didn’t want to let down their friends on the other hand. Chloe said: “Yeah, we totally would love to join, but maybe you have a guest role for Max so that she can step in anytime and watch us first so she gets comfortable with the rules and codes.” Steph nodded and agreed: “Of course this is no problem I already have great ideas as your master, if this okay with everyone.” Mikey and Kim looked at each other and grinned: “Yes, as we already know your strength and weakness so this will be a walk-over for us.” They chatted a little longer but the party of three had to say goodbye because they needed to prepare for some cosplay clip they had planned together with another group.

After they left another couple tiptoed in and sneaked behind Max blindfolding her for fun with their hands shouting: “Welcome back!” Rachel and Drew hugged her from behind and cheered: “Good to have you back!” Rachel said that they were both listening to the ‘Rice and Shine’ podcast Kim’s relatives had already mentioned. The new episode was in response to the current ‘Black lives matter’ protests to support their black sisters and brothers while this time three black women were invited to freely speak about whatever they wanted to say relevant about this complex. After that they decided together to go to the next demo and join the protests. Drew looked at Max: “But we also have a surprise for you. It’s about football. I have a big fan of you who wants to meet you in person again. I already heard the story of ‘Angel Max’ and Sarah. And if it’s okay with you we can stay in the VIP lounge to watch their home match.” Max was totally overwhelmed and was ashamed of being such a special person to someone she barely met and hadn’t done much from her viewpoint. And she even was a white person. As if Drew could read her thoughts he added: “It’s a good start to be aware of the privileges one has.” Rachel and Drew soon said good-bye as they were appointed with a local support group to prepare for the BLM demo. As the two left Max was not sure of the relationship between the two, but who was she to rate that on any scale. She thought of herself and the feelings she had someday for Warren. Chloe looked at her in amusement. Max had the feeling that everyone these days could read her mind openly. “By the way I have another dork listed wanting to make a confession”, Chloe said grinning all over her face. 

Max felt like being the audience watching a thriller with no clue of what the author had planned as Brooke and Warren entered the room. They both awkwardly hugged Max and expressed their happiness that Max was back safely. Warren then started to explain all the advantages of the bracelet they gifted Max at the beach party. Max looked at it as she has seen it for the first time, but now she remembered. Brooke gave Warren a little kick under the table as he looked down guiltily and continued saying that he constructed the bracelet so that it contained a GPS tracker which will sent the coordinates via a steganographic trick to public servers. So they were able to track down Max in time and space. Max looked irritated towards Chloe then Warren and Brooke. He kept humming and hawing before he admitted that he hadn’t thought about the privacy issues and only added it because he liked the challenge to implement it. Brooke added with a side look to Warren: “What he wanted to say is that he is awfully sorry and like to apologize for being such a super dorky nerd.”  
They all looked at each other and began to laugh out loud, even Warren began sheepishly to chime in. Max came over to Warren and said: “Apology accepted, I know that you only had good intentions but sometimes overshoot the mark, that’s okay. I will not trade you and I value you as a very good friend who would do anything as you did when you organized the search together with Brooke and the rest of the group.” Warren seemed to be relieved and blushed even more. After some lighter chatting Brook said that she also get some inspiration from Kim’s relatives and that she read more about trans persons and realized that from a trans women perspective the ‘Loretta’ movie scene is offending and showed only the normativity what a woman makes a woman from a patriarchal viewpoint. Max had to think about Kristen’s girl? friend and that she also had to learn a lot here and may have the chance with Kris to go deeper here if that was okay for her and her friend at a later stage.

After they left Max squeezed Chloe’s hand and said: “Thanks for knowing me better than I do...”  
Chloe just smiled and replied cryptically: “I think I have another fan waiting for you that may shade some light on well-hidden stuff even I wasn’t aware of...”  
This time Max turned already around and saw Kate entering the room having a small package in her hand. She hugged Max tightly and Max was so overwhelmed seeing her best friend again that she shed some tears and tried to blink them away. Chloe murmured some excuse and said she would make some tea for the two. Kate just gave Max a tissue and looked into her eyes while gently saying: “Max as you know I planned to write and paint a book for… you will see for yourself. I wanted you to be the first person to approve it, because…”, she hesitated and continued: “… I think you are a very strong and lovable person and you are my best friend...”, her voice broke and she also had to take a tissue herself. Max was so overwhelmed by her feelings and what love she had already got from her friends today. She opened up Kate’s book and started to read and look at the cute doodles. First she didn’t sense that most of the pictures where showing herself in different scenes and with varying age. One seemed to show the bullying kindergarten scene with Chloe. Another one where she was self absorbed taking photos with her Polaroid. One was even depicting the crowded beach party where she tried to find a quiet spot. She was so immersed into the story that she didn’t realize that Chloe already had come back with fresh brewed herbal tea for them. Kate looked expectantly to Max as she had finished the book. Max was so captured inside her own world and thoughts that Kate looked a little bit anxiously over to Chloe, but she only nodded calmly. Max felt like she was newborn and was experiencing and endeavouring the world for the first time. Or rather watching it from above like an angel and understanding things. It was like in her dream where she was floating and watching it all from an outside viewpoint like an out of body experience. Did Chloe knew it? Kristen? Her parents? She thought about what had happened yesterday and now it even appeared to her like it were years ago. Max felt like surfacing, her vision came back and thereby the faces of Kate and Chloe looking at her. She tried to express what she felt but the only thing she could get out was a deep-drawn sigh.  
Kate looked at her and asked warily: “And what do you think?” Kate realized that Chloe had to pull herself together by not interrupting or speaking for Max. “This feels so… weird and at the same time so right...”, Max slowly spoke like awakening from a long dream. “Just let it sink in and sleep on it. You know that I already have three atypical at home”, Kate laughed and looked over to Chloe. “We can take it slow and if you are ready we can talk about further steps like tests and local Asperger support groups”, Chloe warmly assured her taking her hands. Max nodded slowly and hugged Kate: “You are my angel.” After chatting about some family stuff and plans from Kate while sipping their tea Kate had to leave. “Keep the book as long as you like. We can talk anytime if its okay for you that you are the main character of the book even if there are no names or anything like that.”

After Chloe made them some light evening meal they relaxed a little bit from this overwhelming emotionally day. This time Max was surprising Chloe: “I am totally amazed what kind of impact Kim and her friends and relatives from Germany already had on us. They inspired us in so many ways. And there’s another thing. They said that we need to watch ‘Captain Marvel’ because it was definitely recommended by one of their favorite podcasts ‘bury your gaze’ from the ‘maedchenmannschaft’.” Chloe didn’t seem to be convinced and murmured something about ‘typical blockbuster bullshit’. Max tried to look offended: “Now that I have gained my freedom I demand it!”, and giggled as Chloe tried to get in a more upright position and looked a little bit startled. Max squatted next to Chloe and cuddled against her: “Hey, it’s not ‘She-Ra’ okay? And even you got some wet eyes in the last episodes!”

So, you are not curious?”, Max teasingly asked, but only got a: “Hmmm?”, back from Chloe. 

Max smiled: “If ‘Captain Marvel’ is gay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't know when i began writing the story that there would be so much of myself, what i experienced and what (i wish) could be in it. For me it was a little bit like healing and i hope there's enough 'Life is strange' left in the story that it is accepted by you reader and exciting enough ;-) I had to admit that the queer community is/was uncharted land for me and i try to find out new things every single day. If you feel there is something wrong or offending in there or would like to contribute your thoughts and experience, don't hesitate to comment. tnx for reading the story and maybe i will continue writing in the future :-)


End file.
